What If?

I grew up in Phoenix, Arizona. Every year, on the 4^th of July, my brother would crack an egg on our concrete driveway and watch it fry. It cooked just like it was on the stove. 

I am reading Ellen Galinsky’s book Mind in the Making right now. It is presented as a parenting book about the “seven essential life skills” your children need to succeed. In fact, it is mostly a geeked-out summary of the science on infant brain development. Most of the parenting advice consists of games you can play with your infant or toddler to encourage brain development. These games are remarkably similar to the sorts of things parents do with children naturally.

The brain science is cool, and it’s nice to that academics are discouraging flash cards and worksheets. But somehow, it strips the game of joy when asking your child which block is longer becomes curriculum instead of just playing. The advice is so consistent with normal parenting, it seems a shame to me to have everything spelled out so painfully as exercises and training. The author could have recommended the same behavior by saying, “Screw the flash cards. Spend some time with your kid doing things you both enjoy. Be a normal parent and your kid will turn out great. We have evolved for this and your instincts are leading you right where you need to go. Relax and enjoy!”

This is your brain developing.

One example of positive experiential learning in the book really grabbed me, though. She described a preschool where one day a little boy came in and said, “My daddy says it’s hot enough to fry an egg on the sidewalk today.” So they did. They put an egg in a pan and left it out in the sun. They checked on it every 20 minutes and in three hours, they had a fried egg. Everyone was excited and proud to watch their experiment work.

I know my mom didn’t think of my brother’s fried egg experiment as an exercise to stimulate brain development, or even as developing scientific skills. She naturally understood that "What if" is a Big Question that must be answered. So naturally, my brother asked, “What if I tried to fry an egg on the sidewalk?” she handed him and egg and stood in the shade watching him cook it on the driveway. It didn't take three hours.

 “What if” was a normal part of our childhood. When we were kids, it was taken for granted that kids learn by exploring and trying things out. It makes me sad to think that people today need a book to tell them that.